A couple of weeks ago, whilst channel surfing on Austar late at night, in desperate search of something to watch, I came across Live Nude Girls,* which is definitely not what you’re thinking, despite the fact that it stars Kim Cattrall. It’s a movie, apparently about a bride-to-be on the night before her third marriage, having a girls night in with her girl friends. At the point when I started watching, they were having a candid conversation about masturbation, their fantasies, how long they’d be doing it, the fact that one of them didn’t do it at all, and a very interesting point came up. One of the women made the observation that you see young boys jacking off in films all the time over postcards and Playboy and being Peeping Toms, and yet you never see anything about girls doing the same thing.
So I know it stems from the fact that a woman’s sexuality has always been a source of shame in society since homo erectus but this is ridiculous. It’s the twenty-first century, for goodness sake, isn’t it time we got over these huge double standards?
I found out about masturbation by reading a book, in year 10. And no, it wasn’t the Karma Sutra. It was a historical romance (and a great book, btw) with some fairly detailed descriptions of a young girl’s discovery of love, sex and herself in Renaissance Florence (and how she sleeps with Michelangelo.)
Possibly because I’m not middle-aged and about to married, but I've never had such a bare-bones conversation with any of my girlfriends (about masturbation), even though I can talk to most of them about anything and everything, and have done in the past. But masturbation has only come up once in any of those conversations, and that was in passing. I’d really like to know if my friends do it too. We’ve talked about threesomes, our periods, kissing other girls; why should it be such a big deal? Why is this something we feel we have to write away to Agony Aunts about to ask if this is natural, these feelings, these urges? Why isn't this part of sex ed, of those conversations where women compare great sex, part of something that isn't the sealed section in Cosmo?
I’m not usually the kind of girl who brings this up, but this is outrageous. Why can’t we be proud of ourselves? Don’t we have the right to make ourselves happy too?
*omg, this blog is going to get so many more misdirected hits now...