Monday, 21 February 2011


Hi friends,

I know it's been forever and a day since I've blogged and I'm sorry. Peeps keep getting all up in ma grill about it, so I figured it was time to do something. Plus for the first time ever I've had something of a day off - I worked tonight, and since my parents were here, and I haven't had an entire day just to myself since who knows when, I worked for Oaktree from home.

Speaking of work...I'm sure you've all heard that Borders America just went under in a fairly spectacular way. Yep, they're bankrupt - no money whatsoever (and probably into negative figures in debt). It doesn't help that one day later, Borders Australia (under RedGroup Retail) went into voluntary administration, which means everyone thinks we're in receivership. But we're not. There is a crucial difference - administration basically means an audit, an assessment of our finances to determine a sustainable and viable way forward for the company. Everyone knows that RedGroup Retail has about $43 million debt, and that the book market isn't what it used to be, thanks to e-books, cheap online prices, the comparatively expensive Australian market, and the GFC. But it's also to do with something of the death of reading in our culture. Let's face it, we're technophiles, we're blinkered to and by our computers. If it's not on the interwebs, it doesn't exist, it can't be true, it isn't possible, it's not worth our while. Let's get lost in paper pages, not virtual ones. Let's dare to dream, to imagine, to pretend, to seek, to play, to laugh, to believe in fantasy.

People are freaking out like it's 2012 and spending their gift cards like we're going out of business, which is actually kind of funny. Except for us poor souls in the firing line who have to tell all the customers that to redeem their giftcards, they have to spend twice as much as is on the card, apply to the administrators to redeem the money, or they can hold out and hope for the best, which is pretty much what we're all doing. A lot of customers are lovely, and want us to stay in business - there are even Facebook groups like this! - but it's really horrible to face the angry ones who shout about how it's illegal, and we can't do this to them. The worst, however, is telling young children that they can't spend their entire gift card. Thank goodness the people I work with are lovely and supportive and make work not a completely horrible experience.

So no, I DON'T know what's going on, or if the company has a future...of course I hope we do, and that our store will stay open. There's a lot to be said for job security.

Last weekend I went up to Sydney for K's 21st (you remember her 18th?) which was just fabulous, I'm so glad I was able to make it. I made a speech, which made me realise how much of an amazing friend K is - I've known her for 7 years. How awesome is that? It reminded me of all the insane, crazy, wonderful, incredible times we've had - the late nights, the movies, the shopping trips, the hikes, the runs, the boys, the bush dances, the suspensions (oops!), the classes, the secrets, the crushes (and the code names!) and the tears. K is the loveliest, most beautiful friend a girl could ask for - she's kind, thoughtful, generous, smart as all heck, articulate, sincere, passionate, nerdy, and extremely empathetic. She's always been there for me, even when she had to leave school half way through year eleven. I'm so glad we've stayed in touch, and I'm sure that whatever happens, we'll always be able to call each other and catch up. Anyway, her 21st was just lovely, it was at cozy little cocktail lounge filled with comfy armchairs called Madam Fling Flong. And mmm, were those cocktails delicious! (Gemini tried her darndest to get me drunk again, but to no avail - despite have 6 drinks, I was nothing more than quite tipsy)* All of K's friends from college were there, who were a lot of fun. Got to catch up with D as well, which was fantastic, because he went to China on Thursday on exchange for a whole year :( luckily I was able to go to his going-away party on Sunday, but I'm super sad that's he's gone. He's going to have the best time though.

Apparently one of her friends, F, was kind of keen on me...or so K said. And it might sound awful, but I just wasn't attracted to him at all. I remember a conversation with Sara at A's 21st in October, shortly after the aforementioned asterisked drunk occasion, which went something like this:
Sara: "did you hook up with any boys?"
Me: "no...but apparently one of Gem's friends liked me."
Sara: "so how come you didn't hook up?!"
Me: "I didn't think he was that cute."
Sara: "He doesn't have to be cute..."
Which is a fair point, except that I think I should be attracted, even vaguely, to someone before we hook up. Especially if it's the first time for me. I'm not waiting for fireworks, or to make it some massively romantic/major deal - I just don't want to do it for the sake of, you know? I also think it's unfair to the boy to make out with him if I don't really care for him...

No matter, I'm also about as thick as a 2 by 4, and can't tell when a boy is sweet on me and asking me to dance...silly JAG. Anyway, it was such a great night - we went out afterwards for dancing and were out til 3am...the best nights always are!

Oh, and in other exciting news, my brother has started at Monash University! He's studying Arts, which is KIND OF hilarious, since he gave me crap all those years ago for studying a "dead end degree" that would never get a job. Gotta love irony. He's intending to be a Politics and Communications major, which is way cool, but basically because he has no idea what he wants to do (except maybe get into advertising). I may or may not have mentioned that last year he took a year off and made shitloads of money by joining the Australian Defence Force for a year as part of their Gap Year program (he made like thiry grand, I'm so jealous. Imagine all the places you could TRAVEL with that much money!) He just moved into college yesterday, which I hope he enjoys.

Truth be told friends, I've been mopey lately. I bet you can guess why - it's the same reason it always is. Valentine's Day has been and gone and living alone remains joyfully glorious, but the lack of distraction (in the form of other people) means more time for self-pity, loneliness and ever-growing despair. Gilmore Girls and Glee can really only do so much, and are usually counter-productive, since they're basically all about couples and love. It's getting to the point where it's hard to hang out with other couples (never you Gemini and your gorgeous BF - you're too much good friends) or people in romantically hopeful/flirty situations - it just hurts to much. And I KNOW I'm horrendously desperate, and ridiculously self-indulgent, but there you go. Every day I get closer to 21, and more single, and I'm beginning to wonder how much longer I can stand it.


*ha ha. I totally forgot that I haven't told y'all my "Gemini got me drunk for the first time" story. Must do that soon. It's hilarious!

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